What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?
Last Updated: 01.07.2025 07:23
Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!
Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!
Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.
Is dating in college necessary? Why and why not?
And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...
Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?
Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.
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Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.
In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …
And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.
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At least until the peyote kicks in ...
Make Nazis afraid again!
“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”
How or what is the best way to make a hot rail device? Anddd goooo 👀👀
I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.
Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!
Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.
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But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!
Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)
Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …
Has a psychic ever made a crazy prediction that turned out to be true?
Shameless vixen! Trollop!
Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.
Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.
Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority
Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!
Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.
After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.
¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!
I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.
In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …
Marijuana makes Jesus cry!
Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.
What are some good email marketing tools for small businesses?
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Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.
Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.
What are the best moistening cream and sunscreen for oily skin?
Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!